i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
