What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
