I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize