hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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