so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
