Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
