I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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