Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize