Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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