I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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