i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
