What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
