She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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