Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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