i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
tequila makes me forget i have legs
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
