why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize