id be glad to
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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