if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
