I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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