He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
