I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
