he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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