is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
