It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
