I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
