Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
