if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
