I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
