If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
