Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
