we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
