3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
