no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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