Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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