Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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