Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
