try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
