He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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