He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
