So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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