so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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