Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
