Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
