planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize