So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
