If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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