who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
