I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
