You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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