hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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